Empowerment

An individual is truly happy when he attains self-actualisation. To achieve that he needs to know his purpose in life. This may sound like common sense but the ironic thing is , it ain't that common!

Nobody in your life can make you happy. Happiness is a choice. Here is a tip. If you always get up from the wrong side of the bed feeling lousy, you should try rolling the other side the next day to get a winning attitude! I believe one should always die raised but not below. My goal in life is therefore to love everyone like I love myself and empower them so that they can add value to my life. In this manner, I earn their respect. It is only in achieving this that I will realise my self worth and be truly happy.

In a husband and wife scenario, which is most appropriate because they seek to achieve love and it requires team work, how can they achieve self actualisation?

If you had to name one success where someone has achieved it alone, I bet you can't find any. That is because nobody does. All of us work in a team. In a family, a husband will have to work with his spouse. That way, he grows (and it adds to his ego!). Since he can't do everything himself, he will need to equip her with the neccessary skills and empower her to make decisions early in their marriage life. In doing so, he needs to know that he should not control but earn her respect so that she can play a supportive role. If he continues playing head of household and leads and she does not share the same enthusiasm for his vision, he is taking a very slow walk. A lonely walk. Cosequently, he will feel unhappy and unsatisfied. He becomes worse off and will eventually feel frustrated. For this reason, physical attraction is insufficient for a long lasting relationship. There must be mental and emotional chemistry between spouses and they ought to invest time and work on its development. Remember, if you are not going all the way, why begin the journey?

In my organisation, it is important for me to develop good people relationships. I need to understand their problems and make good decisions, then I manage them. I can always figure out those solutions and instruct them. But the organisation won't grow and everyone will be too dependent on me. A good leader should never have to do everything alone! I really don't need a lonely slow walk.=).

It is, therefore, important for me to listen to my peers, determine if their problem is really a problem and work out a solution. But they will never find the answer in me. They merely go through the thinking process and figure out the answers themselves. That is what I do best. Once they get used to the process, they will come up to me with the issue and the answers! I merely agree since we share the same visions. That is equipping others and empowerment.

I do believe the world will be a happier place and with a whole lot more successful family units if these principles were followed. Love your neighbor as you love yourself and equip your spouse so that he/she is empowered to make good decisions. But remember, if it takes too much effort to do that, you know it is not going to last. For this reason, one should choose a partner who shares the same purpose and vision and has good qualities of being a team player and a leader.

Successful individuals always spend more time preparing than repairing. It is therefore important for couples to fully understand their date. They will have to spend time listening and determining their common goals and aspirations in life. For example, if he wants to be a CEO of the company and he knows that there are several things he needs to do or qualities he needs to develop, she should follow through the process with him. If she can't, he needs to take time to equip her. If she won't, he should know that this relationship does not work for him in the long term. He can avoid the purpose in life for a limited time, but it will always come back to him and he will have lots of repairing and catching up to do. wouldn't it therefore be easier if you chose your partner based on the right mental and emotional qualities.

I have a greater chance of success if he shares my qualities and purpose. I, therefore, look for inspiring and successful individuals who seek to develop others and in the process develop themselves. To the guys who have asked me what I am looking for? Read this. =)